Oh shit! No he didn't...

My 3 favorite ladies are going on a road trip from Lancaster, CA to Chicago IL. I'm currently working on a 4 disc mix set (My most ambitious attempt at mix cd's to date). Here is the one I'm calling "Oh Shit! No He Didn't."

Track List:

1. You got it (The Right Stuff) - New Kids on the Block
2. Kiss Me Deadly - Lita Ford
3. Touch Me (I Want Your Body) - Samantha Fox
4. Point of No Return - Expose
5. Jane Fonda - Mickey Avalon
6. Laugh/Love/Fuck - The Coup
7. Heat of the Moment - Asia
8. To Be With You - Mr. Big
9. Two of Hearts - Stacey Q
10. Talking in Your Sleep - The Romantics
11. Let's Hear it for the Boy - Deniece Williams
12. Shake it Up - The Cars
13. Here I Go Again - Whitesnake
14. I Like it - Dino
15. Girlfriend - Pebbles
16. Maneater - Hall and Oates
17. Head over Heels - The Go-Go's

I'm going to go try to find my balls now. I hope the ladies appreciate this one.

Put that in your blog and smoke it

Time to start blogging again. Bill tagged me with 8 things, so here it goes:

1. I'm fucking crazy. I'm pretty sure that all my past drug use threw all my bodies chemicals out of whack. I also think that a few nerve endings were fried because sometimes I twitch for no reason.

2. The first girl I ever kissed was named Gloria. I was in the 6th grade and it was her birthday.

3. I love dumb romantic comedies. It's embarrassing, but I can't help it.

4. I ran away from my home in Utah on Christmas morning when I was 15. I've been in California ever since.

5. The first time I ever masturbated I was also 15 (that was a big year for me). The Chefs in the restaurant I worked in told me that I was pussy because I had never done it before. God bless peer pressure.

6. I love potatoes.

7. I'm having a baby in September and I'm terrified.

8. My real name is Anthony Jaramillo. Originally i was supposed to be Salvador Anthony Jaramillo, but my Mom cut off the Salvador. I could see myself as a "Sal."

I don't really know who to tag, but I'm going to start blogging again. Peace out.

"Repo Man Haiku for $700 Alex."

Car was repossessed
Yesterday made Tony sad
Knew it was coming

Yesterday my car was finally repossessed. I knew it was going to happen, but it still sucks. At least the Repo Man let me get my cd's out. Looks like I will be riding the metrolink to May Day.

My Complaints are Accompanied by a Six String

I have always enjoyed a good political song. In the past I have made attempts at writing them, but they always seemed a bit callow (Though the only ears to hear those songs were my own).
Any song that can not only touch people, but compel them to take action is truly a magnificent feat. I love those songs.

This is not one of those.

Simply some observations and opinions that are to be screamed over a guitar that is slightly out of tune.

We can wait
Until our problems
Have gone so long
its too late to solve them
Hesitate
Self-Medicate
The kids
Can fix it on their own

Our Attention
Undivided
On the topics
Media provides us
Stories Spun
A War Begun
Before Senate ever had a vote

And no asked how the fire started
We simply empathized for the broken hearted
While our rights are slowly stripped away
Privacy for freedom is the price that we pay

When illness
Is a business
Staying sick
Is what you live with
Pill and Prescriptions
Legal addictions
And a thank you for your time

Because finding cures lowers profit margins
So killing pain becomes your next best option
Your next fix comes in a pharmacy
24 hours, 7 days a week

Can't sleep, counting blessings, counting sheep.

What do you think about when you can't sleep?

Tonight my brain is overwhelmed with memories. They make my heart beat hard and slow. Each time it pumps, it hits the inside of my chest with force. It is the kind of strike that resonates through every bone and every muscle in my body. Like a prize fighter that slowly and surgically throws lefts, rights and uppercuts into the center of my being. There is nothing I can do, but sit awake and think about every punch that is thrown.

The problem is that everything running through my head is so random. The stripper that told about being raped by her father when she was eleven. My Mom's attempt at suicide (for the second time). Singing songs in backyards. My personal fears of failure and being alone. The list goes on.

I am forced to write. My personal little way of turning demons into words. Confessing. I pray silently that by writing this, I will somehow appease some of the dust covered skeletons that are rapping on the closet door.

I wonder if I will ever be brave enough to clean out that fucking closet?

Utah top 5

So my trip to Utah has come to end. Shortly I will be leaving to the Salt Lake City airport and hopefully (crossing fingers) getting a tasty airport Bloody Mary (I know they keep two bars somewhere in the Salt Lake City Airport to make a good impression on people arriving in Utah).

Here are my top 5 Utah moments:

1. Crashing a snowmobile into a boulder.


Riding snowmobiles is a fucking blast, until you crash it into a boulder. I was trying to avoid a group of snowmobile riders who took a break in the middle of the trail. I went on the side of the trail and the fresh powder sucked me and the 850 pound snowmobile into a boulder. I had to bail of the machine in order to not die. The snowmobile survived with only a broken windshield. Good times.

2. Hanging out with my Dad

Me and the old man just don't get to see each other that often. So it was really great to drink beer at 9000 ft. and chain smoke with him all week long. He even gave me fatherly advice, which was pretty cool.

3. Wandering through a house worth 30 million dollars.

This house belongs to a guy named Meta. He was Richard Petty's manager, owned a portion of ford leasing and is real estate developer in PA. This house is ridiculous.

4. Seeing the house I grew up in

I grew up in this little house on Main Street in Park City, UT. I used to have to shovel my way out, to walk down the street and catch a bus to school in the winter. The snow here sucks to have to shovel, but is the best to ride on.

5. Scones

Scones are these tasty deep fried pastries and I love them. They serve them in all the cafes here. I like mine with butter and honey. Mmmmmm.....scone.


So I come home for two days and then leave for tour in Texas. Hopefully the Texas top five will be a little more exciting and involve some BBQ. Peace out party people there is a plane and a Bloody Mary calling my name.

Where in the world is Tony?

Midway, Utah

Some fun facts about Midway, Utah:

• Founded in 1891 by Swiss Emigrants
  
• The City hosted the Cross Country Skiing and Bi-atholon events during the 2002 winter olympics
• I can't find a fucking bar anywhere here. The closest one is in Heber and it is called the Other End.
  
• Known for it's "Hot Pots" or Geo-thermal calderas. (The water is between 90-95 degrees year round)
  
• According to the last census taken 97% of the city is white
• The beer I'm drinking at this exact moment is 3.2%. Thank god I have a bottle of Jager.
• There is a Goose across the street from my Dads and it has a shit fit anytime I go outside.
  

Crackers II

My surreal Utah moment

So I was at my little sisters apartment watching the most recent Dane Cook, HBO Standup special on DVD. I'm drinking her roommates gin and laughing out loud from time to time. My body is requesting nicotine (as it usually does when I'm drinking). Its 4 degrees outside.

I think to myself "Is the cigarette really worth it?"

I step out into the cold Utah air to smoke my Marlboro Light. I can see my breath. My body shivers.

I think to myself again "Is this really worth it?"

A guy with a mullet walks out the door of the building across from my sisters and starts up his car. Its a shit brown Chevy Caprice. He fires it up and runs back inside the apartment building, leaving the car unattended.

"Round Here" by Counting Crows is coming from the Caprice. Its a full moon tonight. I can hear different conversations coming from various apartments in the two buildings. A couple is fighting.

I take a hit of my cigarette.
(Round here we always stand up straight)

"Fuck you Cunt," comes from the apartment above my sisters.

I take a hit of my cigarette. I'm shaking from the cold.

"You are such an asshole!" same apartment, but crying female voice.
(Maria came from Nashville with a suitcase in her hand.)

I take a hit of my cigarette

A beer can is thrown. A door slams. A guy wearing a wool coat and sporting the worlds biggest fucking belt buckle, hops in into his 4x4 and peels out.

(Round here we're carving out our names)

The girl upstairs is crying.
(Round here we all look the same)

My hands and feet are numb. I start coughing.
(Round here we talk just like lions)

I take the last hit of the cigarette and flick it into a snow bank.

(But we sacrifice like lambs)

I never would have pegged that guy as a Counting Crows fan. I need to quit smoking.

My winter mix

Nothing can change this love - Sam Cooke
New Slang - The Shins
Street Fighting Man - The Rolling Stones
The Rescue Blues - Ryan Adams
Blanket of Ghosts - Dustin Kensrue
The Rain - K-OS
Unsubstantiated Rumors Are Good Enough For Me (To Base My Life Upon) - Against Me!
Sorrow - Bad Religion
Tuck Me In - Alkaline Trio
Ain't no reason- Brett Dennen
Blue Eyes - Cary Brothers
Not the Same - Ben Folds

How to spend 30 million dollars

Yesterday I was in a house worth 30 million dollars. The house took two years to build, this was apparently too long for the wife of the bread winner and now she wants him to sell it. I couldn't help but think how nice it would have been to have my best friends and a keg of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Anyways here are some highlights of what I saw:

• The house is 4 stories with its own underground garage and heated driveways
• Theater
• 2 evelvators
• Its own gondola
• The view out of the upstairs shower is worth a million dollars
• A million dollars worth of custom iron work
• the whole house has touch screens to operate it
• Did I mention that this guy built himself a personal gondola...holy shit.

I have never written a song about making sweet sweet loving....this is what happens when it I can't stop thinking about the best thing that has ever happened to me.

We can turn the lights down low
Turn the music up so nobody knows
about the purrs, the screams and the moans
Coming through your room

And I need you so bad
that I've lost self control
We can take it hard and fast
or we can move soft and slow
I can love you like a gentleman
or tie you to the posts
I need you
I need you through the night

I need to feel your teeth in my neck
your hair in my hands
and your nails down my back
we can talk real dirty
about the things we'll regret
and never regret them at all

And I need you so bad
that I've lost self control
We can take it hard and fast
or we can move soft and slow
I can love you like a gentleman
or tie you to the posts
I need you
I need you through the night

Its the end of the world as I know it (and I feel drunk)

I was writing songs outside of the Lostwood House. My friend Dan told us that while he was at the liquor store, a guy walked in a yelled that he wanted "pickled pigs feet and Goldschlagger." He said I should throw it into a song. I decided it would make a fun intro.

I was having one of those days. You know the kind where you pray for a comet to race out of the sky and destroy the earth. Not really hiding too much in this one...not that I ever really do.

Pickled Pigs Feet

Goldschlagger

I've got a book of food stamps

Long since expired

Like the milk in my fridge

Like my hope for humanity

God I know that humanity

Will never listen

I want to watch it end

I want to watch it burn

While listening to R.E.M.

And forgetting all the words

Well I'm praying for a wave

That's tidal, blue and true

Something big enough

to wash away

all the debt that I've accrued

Take the stories from the bars

That were close but not the truth

All the hope for true love

and the hearts that I've abused

I want to watch it end

I want to watch it burn

While singing along to REM

and forgetting all the words

I want to watch it end

I want to watch it burn

While listening to REM

and forgetting all the words

(Its the end of the world as we know it, Its the end of the world as we know it, Its the end of

world as we know it and I feel fine...)

From the Pacific to the Rockies

It is currently dumping snow outside.

I was in San Diego today looking at a couple culinary schools and now I am at 5000 ft in the Wasatch mountains of Utah.

I thought I was just going to sit around and watch Heros tonight...things sure can change at a moments notice.

I'm going to build a snowman and smoke a cigarette in the clean mountain air when I wake up.

Good night.

And now a song about Elliot Smith

I wrote a song about Elliot Smith.....

I just can't go on

with this song in my head

the words end up wrong

when your sick in you bed

I'll be the punchline

to my own joke when I'm dead

Elliot Smith
Elliot Smith

Elliot Smith

I was stabbed

ninteen times

thirteen times

yeah three times

whichever story

you choose is just fine

as long as I'm remembered

with your last drink of wine

Elliot Smith

Elliot Smith

Elliot Smith

I wanna die

Like a samurai

I wanna die

Like a samurai

I wanna die

I wanna die

I wanna die

Elliot Smith

Elliot Smith

Elliot Smith